Buddy Valastro brought cake decorating to a whole new level with his hit show Cake Boss. Still, there are thousands upon thousands of chef’s with immaculate culinary skills and extraordinary decorating techniques flying under the radar and going under appreciated. With Fall colors starting to show and stores beginning to stock up on Halloween supplies we decided to bring you something special. Today we are going to look at 21 of the creepiest, nastiest, most realistic cakes that’ll make your Halloween one to remember. We’d tell you to avoid looking at these cakes while you eat but, as you are about to say, that is entirely the point.
21. Cake Face
We aren’t sure if receiving this cake would be an honor or a threat. The detail on the face, particularly around the eyebrows and hairline, are absolutely exquisite. Now, if we are done talking could you cut me off a cheek?
20. Cake on the Brain
We’re going to call this the low carb version of a ‘head’ cake. Enjoy just the brain without all of that filler flesh. We give bonus points to this artist for incorporating the medical tray and we are very impressed by the brain stem. These are all words that we never anticipated stating in relation to food. Forgive us, stomach.
The creepiest and gnarliest cakes in the world should tell you a story while you eat them. How could you want more story when you have Michael C. Hall as the famous serial killer-killer from the hit show, Dexter? We love the addition of the plastic wrap and there is something genuinely unnerving going on around the ears. Yikes.
18. Check the Temperature
We may have jumped the shark after just three entries but this one, and pardon our pun, really takes the cake. This disgusting creation is rendered in perhaps too much detail. How is it that we can smell it from here? The ‘EZ Lube’ add on is just too much, man. Who would possibly flip through a book of potential designs and point at this picture and say, “That one!”
17. Hannibal Cake
Pay homage to one of the most riveting cannibals in cinematic history by getting your hands on this delightfully dark cake. These mushrooms look delicious and there is a base of, what we assume, cookie crumble overtop of everything. The hand, okay, is a bit much but everything else looks delicious.
16. Good for your Heart
We understand that consuming too much cake might be bad for your heart but this is ridiculous, really. We love the raspberry jam adorning the plate to give the mirage of blood. Still, would your hands shake even a little bit as you pressed your knife into the arterial wall? Ah, these are the kinds of questions that keep us up late at night while we browse the internet.
15. Pigs-head Cake
A decapitated anything will give us the shivers. Here we see a row of pig heads that are perfectly recreated in horrifying detail. Look at the darkness of the eyes and the snout, both places giving the allusion of death. Also move your eyes up to the forehead for additional graffiti adorning every animal.
14. Anatomy of Cake
You were mistaken in believing that your cake was simply made of sugar, frosting, and batter. This cake gorgeously shows just what a talented artist can do when they have the right tools available to them. This toppling tower of gore and viscera looks as disgusting as it does accurate: we have a brain, a heart, ribs, and even the lower intestines. Could you disassociate the visual from the flavor? We aren’t sure that we could!
13. Sweet Green Lamprey
Have you ever had the urge to eat something slimy and nasty looking from the depths of the ocean? Well, here we have a tasty way to indulge your taste buds thanks to a finely detailed lamprey cake. No need for a fishing poll at all!
12. Lend a Hand
Alright, we’ve officially passed the point of no return. There is no way you could convince me to slice up a piece of this cake. What are the fingernails made out of? What madman (or woman) made this thing? Despite our disdain there is something very artistic to appreciate here. The wrinkle lines and tendons standing out near the knuckles are beautifully done.
11. Honeycomb Cake
At first glance this is probably the most tame cake on the entire list. We have a beautifully rendered honeycomb that looks to be dripping with its own sweet nectar. However, these bees seem just a little too well done for us to be entirely comfortable dishing up a slice. Seriously, just look at how fuzzy they appear to be. We sense shenanigans.
10. Mother’s Nightmare Cake
Cake artists who focus on designs like this are aware of the visceral reaction that they are getting out of people. As such, there really is no category of cake design that is considered taboo. Here we see a baby’s head on a plate — something you couldn’t get away with serving in any other field of food. Would we eat it? No. Do we respect the obligation to the art? Yes.
9. Evil Sloth
We may be going against the conventional definition of creepy with this cake but we sure as heck think it is. There is something innately nerve wracking about a creature with huge claws that moves so slow. What are its plans? What is it up to? Why does it remind us of a furry Freddy Krueger? Some questions aren’t ever meant to be answered but that doesn’t mean we can’t sit there and get creeped out by them.
8. Just Playing Dead
We’ll stick with our furry theme and shift gears to what appears to be a dead opossum. There is something profound and disgusting about this sort of cake. It reminds us that we are all essentially soft creatures filled with guts. If that kind of existential thinking doesn’t put you in the mood for cake then what can?!
7. Slice of Baby, Please
This is the kind of cake that makes you re-evaluate the mindset of the person who gave it to you. There are gag gifts and then there are those really messed up gag gifts. Pro tip: don’t get one of these for a mother, a mother who is expecting, a father, a father who is expecting… Or, well, don’t get this cake for anyone.
Do you remember playing the board game Operation? Well, this cake is nothing like that game but it’ll still make you shake as you reach into it. There is a ton of detail here and we love the added plastic bins full of guts. This cake is truly dedicated to its theme and we imagine that it would go over really well at a Halloween party for surgeons or other hospital workers.
5. Plate of Guts
This cake could be baked with water from the Fountain of Youth and we still wouldn’t put a fork near it. The blood splatters and careful tendril styling of the guts make us feel a little, well, sick to our stomach. If you don’t care much for the art of presentation then you can tuck your napkin in and start pigging out. Actually, why don’t you have our plate as well?
4. Cthulu Beckons
Ditch the gore and get your cake on with the ultimate calamari as a focal point: Cthulu. This pint sized rendition of Cthulu carefully and artistically wraps its snaking tentacles around a beautifully rendered skull. This has some of the finest detail work we’ve ever seen on a cake and we can’t help but appreciate just how much work went into even the smallest of places: the suckers, the discoloring on the tentacle, and the hollows of the eyes.
3. Teeth on Teeth
Are you terrified of bugs, aliens, or fish with too many teeth in their mouth? This soulless looking creature may taste delicious but we’re not sure we could get past those finely detailed teeth. Is this just well done fondant work or are you in for a hard surprise when you bite down?
2. Cake of Cults
This three tiered cake perfectly blends beauty and horror together into one gorgeous piece. We have five different types of skulls on display and a frosting that perfectly emulates the natural color and texture of bone once it is exposed to air. There is something here that brings us to mind of the hit HBO series, True Detective. Yeah, we could probably take a bite out of this thing.
1. Nightmare Fuel
When we first saw this cake we experienced an instant bit of dread and a sort of roiling in our stomach. Thankfully the bug, or whatever this thing is, looks absolutely delicious on the inside with a moist chocolate filling and a raspberry sauce drizzled in.